Dementia Related Post

Is Your LIfe Aimless?

Some days, I’m just so down, and life seems too hard to cope with!

The reasons can be manyfold; if I’ve had a seizure, a bad turn, having problems with one medical condition or another, another mouthful of tablets and another day of suppression. This all grinds me down, and physically it is hard to fight to get up and work for your recovery. Then there is the mental anguish that comes with this, thinking of an uncertain future, questioning why even try and in today’s situation having another thing to worry about!

After reading this last paragraph, I bet your feeling that low setting in? See that is the problem. These things compound a sense of despair, and once we get on this course, it is so easy to allow it to continue in a downward path. The deeper you get, the harder it becomes to fight it.

How do I cope? I have an aim, or aims, for the day. Something that I can work on and complete. A challenge that requires effort may be physically, mentally or best both! It isn’t always easy, but ordinary things come up all the time, and something will always need doing! This requires a bit of effort, and I mean a bit. However, too often, the idea of sitting in front of the telly being nullified can seem good enough.

It’s not about extraordinary challenges like learning to fly, completing the thousand-piece jigsaw, knitting that jumper you always wanted. It is about small steps. Clean my desk, do that pile of washing, checked that thing online that I’ve been thinking about and must do, and the list goes on.

As I said, there are always things to be done; it’s doing them that is often the problem. Do you find yourself thinking, when, or maybe tomorrow, or next week? Setting an aim and sticking to it can solve many ongoing worries that you don’t need to have. I find that once I’ve completed any task, I feel good about it; I’ve accomplished something. This is an important point because if you’re stuck in, retired, confined, you’ll often think there isn’t any reason to accomplish anything anymore! Your life can so quickly become aimless.

Those things that I once saw as a task, chore, something to endure have now become something I do. When I’ve done these things I can get on with the things I want to; the fun stuff. This is all the motivation I need.

I’ve got to point where my goals ensure that anything that comes my way, will not force me into the dark.

Those things you’ve been putting off, avoiding at all cost and just do not want to do, often give the most generous rewards when complete. I’ve started many things and after days, weeks and months working my way through and being halfway and everything looks a million times worse than when I started, and you think, Why did I bother? You can’t go back… it is hard, but when you begin to see the good shining through, it was all definitely worthwhile. Being an Ostrich and hiding your head in the sand, just doesn’t work. Small steps, small aims work!

Your aims will undoubtedly be different from mine, and you’ll most likely have many. If it is a big thing, try not to think of it as a whole. For example, if I think today I have to finish a song, it can be mind-blowing, but I break it down, find the music, get the words, listen to it, do a few simple recordings, add some backing tracks, record a bit more, and before I know it, I’ve got a song. Each stage is a separate aim. So if you have a project started such as clear that bedroom, decorate or reuse it in some way, try not to see the end room as the task, but break it down into small steps; today I’ll move the stuff off the shelves, I’ll get someone to collect that bed, I’ll paint that wall.

Don’t let these aims become the ruler of your life, but a friend. If the aim you have starts to become never-ending, it is most likely too big an aim! Break it down into smaller achievable steps.

If you don’t finish a set aim, because something else comes along, the boiler blows up, a friend pops by, and you just have to go shopping, don’t worry, whatever you’ve done is certainly better than doing nothing. Just don’t let every little thing become an excuse.

For example; I try to write something for my blog every day, and I try and start it in the morning. This morning, the weather looked good, so I could go out and do my Trike exercise. I have an aim to go out at least three times a week. I was working on my blog, and the time came for me to go out. No problem, I saved my blog and went out. I’m now back after my exercise, feeling good, all washed and changed and set to finish the blog.

I also notice that having aims helps me to stop worrying about things to be done, that I haven’t. If I’m doing something set as an aim, I just concentrate on that alone. I realised that when I’m out exercising, I’m in the moment. I can enjoy the world around me without having my mind cluttered. When I’m on task, I am on task.

Routines are good, but we don’t want to be stuck by routine. Have an aim, make it new, novel if you can and if it is something you really want to do; learn to knit, paint, build a house, go for it, but in small steps and you’ll get there.

This idea of aims seems to do something beneficial for me. Things pop up all the time, and I think I’ve got to do that, so I try and think when? I try not just to throw it in with the hundred and one other things that will come up during the day.

I think when you are looking at aims, try and make them something you can complete and achieve in a single session, and you will feel so much better when you’ve done it!

I make notes, or I should say scribbles, but I’m thinking, should I have a note book that is just, Things to be Done? What do you think?

So, what have you got planned today, what is your next achievable aim?

Please comment on anything I have said. Thank You!

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